A position opened up at work this week. I’m not terribly hopeful I’ll get it, but I happen to fit the profile they’re looking, so I decided to go for it.

Unfortunately, the last time I updated my CV was when I applied for my current position, and back then I was still presenting as male. Which meant I didn’t just have to update my references and list my current position, I also had to change all the gender-related stuff, and scan my name change documents to explain why Liliana Amanda is sending the diploma of [dead name] as her own.

The worst part is, they sent the notice about the position today, and said the deadline is tomorrow. Gaah!

I left work as soon as I could, and rushed home to scan all my documents and start editing my CV. Unfortunately, the driver of the bus that I take home apparently decided it was a good day for a late lunch, and I spent maybe half an hour at the bus stop.

I eventually got home, and rushed to the computer… to find I only had a PDF copy of my last CV, and essentially had to retype and create it all over again. No big deal…


It’s now four hours since I finished my shift, and I only just sent my CV to my supervisor and the appropriate department. I have to go to bed in 15 minutes because I have a blood test to get to early tomorrow before work.

I haven’t had dinner yet.

Some days, I feel I have way too much time and spend it reading, or writing this blog. It’s part of why I started this, in fact: to find a more productive use for my time.

Today though… sigh. I kinda wish I was Hermione and had a time-turner, so I could go back to a few hours ago and take care of everything else I have to take care of.

Time is frustrating.

I spent years and years suffering as someone I wasn’t, each day a fresh agony. Yet the last year of joy has rushed by, to the point I still can’t register I’ve been living as myself for so long.

It always slows when you want it to go fastest, and rushes when you want to savour it and enjoy every moment.

Ah well.

Sorry for this excuse for a post. I really have been very busy today, and am feeling nearly as sleepy as I am hungry. I promise I’ll write something more substantial for Friday’s post.

Hope you have a good week, and that time has been treating you more kindly than it has me.


One thought on “Time

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